December 13, 2010
Dear Diary,
I'm so mad that I don't know where to start. The Trusteeship hearing was so UNFAIR! I was really excited about the hearing starting because I would finally have the chance to tell everyone my side of the story. That Personal Representative Mike M. that Jimmy H. appointed has been telling the worst lies about me. What's even worse he is siding with everyone that hates me for no reason like Kevin H., Wayne K., Tommy B., Brian N., Eric K., and Mark D. Kermit W. said they are just jealous of me because my head is shaped like a penis and I should ignore them.
Todd C. and I prepared for the hearing all day Sunday. I even missed the Jersey Shore we worked so hard. Donny w. said he recorded it on his TiVo. Todd made me practice standing up and shouting over and over "Your argument is invalid" . As a reward for my hard work I went to sleep with my favorite picture of Justin Bieber under my pillow and set out my lucky white panties to wear to the hearing.
Like I said the hearing was totally unfair. They let other people talk and ignored me every time I stood up and yelled "your argument is invalid" One of the mean guys Jimmy H. put on the panel asked Todd C. if I was on medication or just plain stupid. This same guy is so dumb he forgot my name was John and every time I stood up he said "Run Forest run." Everybody laughed including Todd C. At recess Todd C. told me that I was getting him in big trouble by shouting and I needed stop. I told him that he isn't the boss of me but Todd C. said if I didn't stop he wouldn't spank me before bedtime anymore. Todd C. is a really good spanker so I stopped. So Todd C. wouldn't forget that I'm the boss I made him give me a stinky finger under the table for like an hour before lunch.
The entire day was nothing but talking, talking talking by everyone but me. It was really boring like when Kevin H. would talk about grievances at Republic Services. BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. I'm so glad I fired him so I don't have to listen to him drone on about representing the members. Anyway after what seemed like forever we finally stopped but guess what we have to go back again tomorrow! My head will explode if I have to listen to another day of talking.
When we got back to the office Johnny G. said he would take me out dancing after the hearing was finished. I CAN FINALLY WEAR MY NEW DRESS. I told Donny W. to bring Patrick D into my office. I was really angry at Patrick D. because before the hearing I ordered him to go to Court and make sure I was the only person allowed to talk. Patrick D. started making excuses and using big legal words. He started saying something like "John you just can't do whatever you want..." but I covered my ears with my hands and yelled "NAH NAH NAH I CAN'T HEAR YOU. As punishment I made him give me a Dutch Rudder but I think he secretly enjoyed it. I sent him home and told him he better make sure nobody talks tomorrow except me.
